


Pip pip!

by SharkbaitHooHaHa



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Fluff, Humor, Ineffable Bureaucracy (Good Omens), M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-23
Updated: 2020-01-23
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:34:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22378777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SharkbaitHooHaHa/pseuds/SharkbaitHooHaHa
Summary: Aziraphale gives Crowley a kiss goodbye, just like he always does. Unfortunately, he forgot they were in a meeting with both of their bosses.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 26
Kudos: 229





	Pip pip!

Aziraphale was nothing if not a creature of habit, and there were certain actions that had become as second-nature to him as breathing was for humans. Which was why when he realized he was running late for a miracle he was to perform across the city, he bade Crowley goodbye in exactly the same way that he had for the past six thousand years– he kissed him on the lips.

It was only _after_ he pulled away that he remembered that this was neither a date nor one of his typical meetings with Crowley, and that this particular gathering happened to include two other parties. So, with a great deal of trepidation, he turned around to meet the shocked faces of Gabriel and Beelzebub.

The two had come to Earth to sort out a mess where both Aziraphale and Crowley had been ordered to perform a miracle and a temptation with the same end goal in mind. Having achieved that goal, their bosses had shown up to decide which side would take credit. In the end, it went to Crowley, who had actually performed the action (as a miracle on Aziraphale’s behalf, but neither Heaven nor Hell needed to know that,) and they were just finishing up when Aziraphale remembered his prior commitment.

His mind raced as he tried to come up with a suitable explanation for his actions. When none presented itself, however, he instead did the first thing that came to mind.

“Gabriel!” He grabbed the Archangel’s face and kissed him soundly. “Thank you for taking the time to be here today.” He was so close to the door. He could just leave. Except he was acting on autopilot, now, and his mind had apparently decided that he needed to see this through.

“Beez!” He cringed internally as the nickname left his lips. That was another poor choice, but it was too late to take it back. “Always a pleasure,” he said as he crossed the room to give the Prince of Hell a goodbye kiss, as well.

“Well!” He made his was back towards the door, somehow displaying a much cooler head than he actually possessed at the moment. “Pip pip, then!” He called as he finally made his escape.

Gabriel and Beelzebub stared at each other in mixed confusion and horror before they turned to look at Crowley, who was doing an incredibly poor job at hiding his complete panic, especially since Beelzebub had made him take off his sunglasses for the meeting

“That’sss…” Crowley’s eyes darted around frantically. “That’sss how humans are sssaying goodbye these days!” he exclaimed with so much forced casualness that he came across as slightly unhinged. “Ssso!”

He stood, his movements uncoordinated and erratic, like a marionette being controlled by an unskilled puppeteer. The look on his face indicated that he would rather swallow a whole gallon of holy water than kiss either of them, but he gave them each a quick peck before racing towards the door, a strangled ‘pip pip’ following him as he left.

There was a moment of silence as Gabriel and Beelzebub tried to process what had just happened.

“Well, if the humans are doing it,” Gabriel said, spreading his arms and taking a step towards Beelzebub.

He was stopped by a blistered hand on his chest. “Don’t. Even. Think. About. It.”

**Author's Note:**

> Based off the one scene from Friends.


End file.
